The Circle Series- Seriously!? [Parody One shots]

[straywolf174]

ON A CERTAIN DAY


ON A CERTAIN TIME


IN A DIFFERENT WORLD


THIS, LIKE, TOTALLY HAPPENED!



This terribly written parody was done, mostly as a cure for boredom. As most of you know I lack consistent internet access, and when you have nothing but an Android's notepad at three in the morning…what's an insomniac to do?

That said, this is purely fan based and in no way relates to the circle series, plot, or Roleplay in any way. Each part is it's own story, and because characters in this are for parody purposes, personalities, histories, etc. are moldable for my - and maybe your, - amusment. Nothing about this is acurate so please don't reference this to anything aside from entertainment purposes.

:: Though easter eggs may possibly be hidden, and I'm sure our one fan may make sense of even the most pointless writing. ::

Characters of course were taken out of the circle series, but if you'd like your own character to suffer in order to alleviate my boredom, shoot me a message and request it.
I'm unsure how long this "story" will be, but it's probably not going to stop after two chapters - mostly because I'm almost always in need of some sort of fix.That said, on with the show!






Scene One: Cats, Weasels, snakes and...wait, what?!


Cats were just evil. This was Stray's feeling since the very beginning, and yet Setoku still talked her into getting the beast for wolfcub. Why she agreed to let her sister walk about in a kingdom of monsters she'll never know.
For cryin' out loud, vacation time meant nothing when you were in the belly of a Gillian!

Begrudgingly she stared down at the orange tabby, trying to make sense of the situation. The thing was barely bigger than a shoebox, and smelled even worse; Dirt and old litter penetrated the Psuedo Visored's nose, and it was all she could do to hold in the remains of some poor soul that became lunch two hours prior. She wondered if it tasted the same, but decided not to test the theory. Geez, had she been without it for that long?! Stray shook her head at the scene in her head before making a mocking growl at the little She-devil. The femme cat's tail fluffed up as she hissed back, intimidated by the tall woman before her. Stray scoffed at the reaction. Pathetic instincts too, huh? Gods was this thing useful for anything!?
Challenged, Stray snorted and reached down - picking her up by the tail as her limbs flailed about in fear. "Show some respect!"

"Why on earth would such a grand specimen respect yer' brutish arse?"

The pestering voice rang out in the halls as the teen-like Shinigami strode out with pride. Kisagi had been invited for a get together not too long ago. For some strange reason, Wolfcub had taken a liking to him - so whether she liked it or not, Stray was forced by moral code to play nice…for now. Proving this only by not blowing him up when his green eyes surveyed her.

Stray grumbled out something along the lines of 'You imps all act alike'. The tabby was unaffected by the arival, and continued it's feeble struggles. Loud yowls making Stray want to slam the thing against a wall.
Kisagi eyed her expectantly, an arched brow daring her to act out of character and actually love on the fluff bucket of cuddles. Like flailing limbs of sharply clawed paws would be "cuddly". My ass.. Suffice it to say, she wasn't a fan of breaking the fourth wall. If she was, she would have made her application much less…pitiful.

That damn writer had no idea what she was doing! What were the forum staff thinking when they made her a moderator!?

Some people just didn't know how desperation was spelled nowadays.



~*~*~*~*~


…
…...
………


(edit: Apparently neither do you…)

(edit: Actually Lassie, she thought it right.)



~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~


"Kisagi, stick to the story!" Stray barked, making the editorial malfunctions disappear from sight - fourth wall repairing itself once more. Unfortunately for her, the prey had escaped from her grasp, and the scientist was nowhere to be seen. "Kuso! The damn flea ran off with the lousy beast!"
With an annoyed hiss, Stray took off in a sprint - because no amount of cat scratches was worth a sonido. Still, who knew what torture Kisagi could be putting the beast through!

Jen was going to kill her with those god damn puppy eyes (and a vad of acid!) if she wound up empty handed.


~*~*~*~*~



(edit: ~ Meanwhile in a place not that far away ~ )




"Weeeeee~!" The scientist rode through the skies of las noches, the former Tabby sprouting rainbow colored spirit energy from it's tail to wreck havoc among the dunes…but more importantly, giving him a really fun ride!

"Honestly, Kisagi, must we ride it so high up!?" The deeper voice cried. Kisagi turned slightly, a small smirk forming at seeing Kurome. The purple eyes reflected fear as the man clung to his rival's Haori. Kisagi let his fingers run through the large cat's fur, a rumbling purr following to assure him of the sweet spot hidden there. "It's not that high up, Kurome-kun~!" kisagi tilted his head upward, the electric blue bangs sheilding his eyes from the man as he spoke. "Are you afraid I won't catch you when you fall…?"

Kisagi's voice was coated in salted honey, and it burned Kurome's pride greatly. With a start, the man adjusted himself into a more propper sitting position, the red at his cheeks dispersing as he did so. "Not really, boy. I'm just afraid you may have forgotten your place."

"Nope. I haven't." Kisagi assured, patting the monstrous tabby as a signal to go faster. When the thing roared and zoomed as commanded, Kurome nearly whined in apprehension. If there is an actual God…Might he smite this Neanderthal!

Just then a bala fired off, only missing Kisagi's head because Miss Tabby Two-Point-Oh swerved out of the way. The burning orb ripping the Haori in half as it fluttered past the claw of a moon, smoke following its slow descent. While the bala startled him, Kurome was unsurprised by the cat. For some reason, it seemed Kisagi had a way with animals. Cats in particular. Though like people, they always seemed to run away when things got too dangerous. Well…everyone except Himself. Still, as he looked onward, Kurome saw that there was a more pressing matter to think about at the moment. Apparently Kisagi pissed Stray off…again. He couldn't help the smile that formed. "Kisagi-Kun…?"

"Aye, I know. She's gotton sexier since the war ended. So what?" This earned a glare from Kurome, but Kisagi merely shrugged.

Paying no attention to Stray's idle threats the Tabby reacted to his will, all 800 pounds of feline fury charging forth. Kurome decided enough was enough, and as the cat crashed to the ground on all fours he jumped off and made his exit.
Screw this. I signed up to jump Kisagi's bones, not be tortured!

A pat on the head signalled Kurome's goodbye to his former squad mate. Perhaps he should go hunt for a tomb stone…Stray certainly wasn't going to let him get away with just a tattered Haori.





~ Meanwhile in a place not full of dead people! ~






Setoku had originally gone to the Human world on Stray's request. The deal was that if she had to watch the…uh…stray cat, than he was to suffer shopping with his dearest sister. Although the trip initially was a bit...out of his element, it soon paid off, for he had found a tv section that showed his flawless face. "God I'm so f***ing sexy…"

Of course, The Shinamori clan's God might be sexier had he been granted his actual Arrancar appearance.  Wolfcub gave him a gigai fit for a Hollow. Sad to say, the whole human transformation thing was something only Stray herself managed. Not that he would actually attempt such a disgusting thing!
Though by the way those girls in the corner of the plaza kept eyeing him, he might just consider it...might.


_________________

The end……or is it?!
Stay tuned!

…or not? Gods I need better amusement. I wrote a crap load of rated R material, but I'm a mod now soooooo…pg-13 only. Sorry flea's!

Seto edit: So 2013. I got rated r content in the circle series. Not even implied! Full on action! So you can too..! If you uh, write it correctly... And god, I am sexy! -gets distracted by nearby mirror-)

SETOKU GET OUT OF MY BATHROOM!!

Ohh... So that's what this is... -grabs a handful of bathroom supplies before jumping out the window, leaving the toilet seat up and a trailing roll of t.p following close behind- (...ha! Get it?)

[Setoku]

Circle Series Mod note: true chapter 2

Meanwhile, at the legion of doom!!!

"God damn... I am one sexy guy..."

Said Setoku as he stood in the Denny's bathroom, ogling his pale, nude gigai form. Jen had done well, minus the hanging mass of flesh between his legs. She got the measurements off... By 18 inches! The 9 there was a good guess, sure, but she was still off!

"Stray... Our mortal daughter really needs to learn differences between inches and meters..."

Little did he know, they were both there! Both pressed at
the door in the stall, each trying to get a peek. It was all going to plan, until a sneeze from the second stall caused the covers to be blown, and Setoku to spin on his heel and bring his arms over his chest, letting out a girly squeal. And was it behind door number two?

"Hi... Setoku-kun! Covering the wrong part!"

Lyonin giggled out as he quickly vacated the scene, a trail of toilet paper stuck to his sandal as he made his escape.

"My god! It is the wrong part!!"

Setoku let out as he dropped his hands down to cover his uh, 'shame.' Once he did, stray kicked open her stall door, screaming something about Lyonin incoherently as she destroyed her way too the door... And Setoku let out another girly scream!!

-end of 'Fifty Shades of Setoku. Short one. Applause-

(Phones to type suck. My hentai happy hour was ruined!!!)